“You Can’t Control It” Is Only a Partial Truth

“You Can’t Control It” Is Only a Partial Truth

Have you ever had someone tell you that you can’t control your loved one use’s and that you just need to let go and detach and thought there has got to be something that I can do address this problem?
 

If you answered yes, I’m really glad you’re here, because this episode of Hope for Families TV is for you!

I talk a lot about cultural myths that circulate about addiction and family addiction. While the slogan “You can’t control it” is not a myth, it’s also not a complete truth. Families do have influence on the problem. They’re influencing the problem no matter what they do.

To learn more, watch the episode below. It’s the second episode in a series I’m doing called “Why I do what I do.”

So, I’d love to hear from you. What are your thoughts? Drop a comment below or email me at questions@madeleinecraig.com.

We Will Never Resolve the Addiction Crisis Without Supporting Families

We Will Never Resolve the Addiction Crisis Without Supporting Families

Have you ever wondered why we have not been able to resolve the addiction crisis? And why the problem just seems to keep getting worse?

If you answered yes to this question, this episode of Hope for Families TV is for you!

There are of course, several reason why we haven’t made more progress in addressing the problem. One of them, however, has to do with the lack of adequate support for you the family member.

To learn more, watch the episode below. It’s the first episode in a series I’m doing called “Why I do what I do.”

So, I’d love to hear from you. What are your thoughts? Drop a comment below or email me at questions@madeleinecraig.com.

I also have an addiction and am in recovery. Why should I to work a family recovery program when I’m already working my own addiction recovery program?

I also have an addiction and am in recovery. Why should I to work a family recovery program when I’m already working my own addiction recovery program?

If you are already working a 12-Step program, but you are still struggling to address your loved one’s addiction and take care of yourself around this issue, you very well may need a family recovery program in order to do so.

There are several things to keep in mind here:

The 12-Step program that supported your recovery is designed solely to support your own individual recovery, not the recovery of a loved one. These programs may use an almost identical process, but they use them for very different purposes.

Also, you will not necessarily find the support of others who can help you face someone else’s addiction in your first recovery program. You will find them in a family recovery program, whether that’s a 12-Step family recovery program or something else.

It is easy for someone who has already recovered from their own addiction to think they can help their loved one recover too. But your loved one may not be willing to hear anything about recovery from you.

There might be too many other emotional ties in the mix to make them open to hearing it from you. They may need to hear it from someone else. Your example of recovery may be all you are able to effectively offer, at least in the beginning.

This might be difficult to accept, and you may need your own support around that, support you will find in a family recovery program.

I grew up with addiction, now I have a loved one who is also addicted. How do I address both issues?

I grew up with addiction, now I have a loved one who is also addicted. How do I address both issues?

It is not uncommon for someone who grew up with addiction in the family to marry someone with an addiction, have a child who develops an addiction, or both.

This is another reason for you to work on your own healing and recovery.

As an adult child of a mother and stepfather with addictions, however, I know that a specialized focus on issues specific to adult children can be extremely helpful. You might want to seek out 12-Step meetings that focus solely on adult children. You might want to learn as much as possible about the issues specific to adult children.

I would also suggest you learn more about complex PTSD, as children raised in homes affected by addiction often develop complex PTSD by the time they are adults, even if there was no physical violence in the home.

I’ve listed resources for this on the Resources page on my website. There are also resources there that are specific to parents of a substance user.

Why won’t my insurance cover in-patient treatment? I thought the Affordable Care Act made addiction care a requirement for all insurance plans.

Why won’t my insurance cover in-patient treatment? I thought the Affordable Care Act made addiction care a requirement for all insurance plans.

The Affordable Care Act does require all insurance policies to offer addiction treatment coverage. But it allows policies to set conditions on treatment if they choose.

Some policies require a person to go through outpatient treatment before they will cover in-patient treatment.

This can be really challenging – I know, because what it basically means is that your loved one has to fail out-patient treatment before they will be offered in-patient treatment, and that “failure” could have devastating consequences.

Other policies might require pre-approval before your loved one can be admitted to a treatment program. Again, by the time you get a doctor’s pre-approval, your loved one could change their mind.

There are three things you can do:

First, do your research about your insurance and available treatment options right away.

If your loved one will need pre-approval, it might be worth your while to contact your primary care physician, or another willing physician well ahead of time, explain your situation to them, and see if, when your loved one is ready, they would agree to get your loved one in on a last-minute basis so you can get the pre-approval with minimal delay.

Finally, I suggest you contact your congressperson and ask them to support updating the addiction treatment mandates in the Affordable Care Act.

My loved one claims they’re smoking marijuana for medical reasons. How do I know if they really need marijuana for their problems?

My loved one claims they’re smoking marijuana for medical reasons. How do I know if they really need marijuana for their problems?

The short answer is you don’t.

However, you can nevertheless take actions in response to how their use is affecting you.

There is a lot of controversy around marijuana, especially around potential medical uses of it.

But here are some things we do and don’t know about it.

We do know that marijuana is addictive, and it does have psychotropic properties that impede cognitive and motor functions. The level of addictiveness and degree of impairment is somewhat less than other drugs, but it is nevertheless significant.

There is a lot of information about research done about the addictive nature of marijuana in the Surgeon General’s Report on Alcohol, Drugs and Health. There is a link to this report on the Resources page on this site.

Speaking of research however, the research on medical uses of marijuana is very limited because congress has placed severe restrictions on research of the plant.

There is significant anecdotal evidence, however, of numerous medical benefits of the plant, but research that could back these up is limited. That said, more and more is coming out every day.

The controversy over the potential medical uses of marijuana is also tied up with controversies over the power of pharmaceutical companies in the US in driving research and drug profits, and that’s not something that can be addressed in this workshop.

So, in short, a discussion with your loved one around problems the marijuana use is creating in their life and your relationship, and the degree to which your loved one is showing signs of being addicted, is likely to be more fruitful than a debate on its medical benefits.